โYou missed out.โ Is there another sentence that could strike such anxiety in the hearts of young people? Other than โWe need to talk,โ of course. Itโs true, though, and we need to talk about fear of missing out. Known as FOMO in millennial-speak, fear of missing out is quickly taking a toll on Generation Yโand itโs probably causing damage to your own life.
Do you have trouble sitting through a movie without obsessively checking your phone? Does your family complain about your constant social media habit? If you panic at the thought of not having a window to the world, you may be experiencing FOMOโwhich was added to the Oxford English Dictionary in 2013. ย Living our lives through this virtual filter isnโt really living at allโit only fuels an anxious mindset that we must be โmissing out.โ
With at least 24 percent of teenagers online โalmost constantly,โ itโs no surprise that fear of missing out is an epidemic among millennials. โFOMO is especially rampant in the millennial community because they see a peer achieving something they want, and somehow in their mind, that achievement means something is being โtaken awayโ from them,โ said Darlene McLaughlin, M.D., assistant professor at the Texas A&M Health Science Center College of Medicine and a psychiatry and behavioral health specialist with Texas A&M Physicians.
Itโs easy to define our lives based on the virtual crowd watching, critiquing, and applauding our every move. Itโs even easier to conform to the crowdโs moldโconstantly measuring our lives against a celebrityโs Instagram post or a friendโs life event.
This โgive me moreโ and โI want thatโ attitude can be detrimental to us both physically and mentally. In fact, recent studies have shown that FOMO is linked to feelings of dissatisfaction. โThe problem with FOMO is the individuals it impacts are looking outward instead of inward,โ McLaughlin said. โWhen youโre so tuned in to the โother,โ or the โbetterโ (in your mind), you lose your authentic sense of self. This constant fear of missing out means you are not participating as a real person in your own world.โ
The average college student spends eight to 10 hours killing time on their cellphone each day, and when we consistently believe we are โmissing out,โ anxiety and depression may set in. Itโs no surprise then that anti-depressant use is very high and grows each year.
โFOMO certainly instills anxiety and depression, but, we need to push back against framing this โfear of missing outโ as a mental health condition,โ McLaughlin said. โFOMO is an emotionโdriven by thoughtsโthat can create the fear and anxiety which leads to a mental health diagnosis. Itโs a symptom of a larger problem at hand.โ
According to McLaughlin, at least three to 13 percent of the population are diagnosed with a condition called social anxiety. โPart of social anxiety is the fear of being judged by others or embarrassing oneself in social interactions,โ she said. โFOMO is very damaging to someone suffering from this anxiety disorder because it fuels a lack of self-confidence and social avoidance.โ
While we may not all experience severe social anxiety, sadly, many of us have pretty bad cases of FOMOโeven if weโre unwilling to admit it. And, this incessant worrying about what everyone else is doing only causes us to miss out on our own lives even more. So, how do we fix FOMO? Maybe with a large dose of YOLO (you only live once).
The mental exercise of re-framing is extremely helpful to combat FOMO and there are many common negative thought patterns you may not notice. Building your arsenal against these patterns is key. The next time you feel stressed out about that friend whoโs travelling the world while youโre stuck at a desk, try these techniques:
- Track your negative thoughts: Keeping a thought journal will allow you to observe just how often negativity rears its ugly head. Anytime you have a negative thought, write it down and analyze why or how this thought may be limiting you.
- Replace negative thoughts with more reasonable ones: Use milder wording during your thought process, ask yourself โwhat can I learn from this,โ and challenge your assumptions to determine what the frame behind your thought is. Itโs possible you have a limiting belief that could be holding you back.
โUse your thoughts and feelings to propel and harness the intrinsic motivation to achieve your own goals,โ McLaughlin said. โItโs also beneficial to realize you canโt judge a book by its cover. The outward image people project on social media isnโt necessarily truthfulโyouโre never getting the entire story.โ
If the stress and anxiety behind FOMO begin to take a significant toll on your life and health, itโs always best to contact your health care provider. โItโs important to get ahead of negative thought patterns before they begin to cause havoc,โ McLaughlin said.
Texas A&M Health Science Centerย is Transforming Health through innovative research, education and service in dentistry, medicine, nursing, pharmacy, public health and medical sciences.ย Original article: https://vitalrecord.tamhsc.edu/fomo-life-youre-missing/
